Yeah eh eh, so Hard... So hard.. so hard...

Yup, I know, its been like 4 soon to be 5 mths since 2010. Havent thought of a new layout, prolly stick till 2011? Not sure.. been busy, either going for de stupid silver kitty thing or getting high and drunk on de weekends.

Been living a life of a prostitute. Always asked to do thing, do do do do do do do, after 1 task its anotehr one.. it jus goes on and on and on. Not only me, everybody in my plt suffering like I do. Well, its ok we keep kena arrow-ed, cos bo pian, but once we finished our thigns at end, another few piles in. Its neverending, and its always de last min kind, so u cannot plan for it.. and worst of all, ur effort is always not appreciated.

My decision to sign on, has been huanting me since.. and den, to make things worse, I havent get my bonuses yet, thanks to the beautiful organisation. During the recruitment talk, they make it sound so fanciful, den said, "U get ur bonus, str8 after u commission." Well, they missed out, de part, have to find sureties, time to process de sureties, etc etc.

Den they reject my father and sis as my sureties. So yup! I m stuck finding sureties! Found some frens, but they gonna ord soon, den still mus "apply" for them to be sureties, then mus wait, den they go down, blah blah.. super troublesome i tell u.. its freakign irritating! Den de irony is, as long as 21 and abv dont need surety, but I am 21 going to 22 now! they say on de day de contract start mus be 21, but its nto as if they give me on de day contract start? zzzz den my frens, can dont be 21 on de day de contract start, but so long their 21 now. WAT NONSENSE?!?!

Well, den my very very very good "higher up" de one dropping work to us like dropping breadcrumbs to birds, have this very favourite pet phrase: "Very easy 1, not difficult at all, " Ya lo, cos hes not de one doing, hes not de one putting any effort, and after dat, he gets de credits. Not even a thank you, well done or any actions towards that meaning at all. Even prostitutes get, " wow ur ______ was great!" then they get paid. so ya.. haiz...

Ok enuff abt de army stuffs, personal life hasnt been very great either, thanks to a grp of very good frens, it has been manageable. THANKS MY SLUTS!! =D REALLY LOVE U GUYS~!!
Its how very wierd de way we met each other, and ended up so good frens =D Fate is such a wierd wierd thing.. but not blaming it, or i wldnt meet such awesome frens!! Thanks, Aaron, Fad, Nel,Alan....... many many more. If ur name wasnt mentioned here, dont harp too much onto it, I still appreciate knowing u guys, its jus dat theres a freaking long list to go on and on and on and on and on and on and on.. hahhaha

Frens, are easy to get, but Great Frens who understands, shares everything w u, tolerate ur nonsense, is hard to come by.. SO cherish them if u have them, and if u dont, I pray that u will meet them soon =) Everyone deserves at least 1 Great Fren. I wish for everyone to have that deserve. Jus like everyone deserves to be loved.. we r owed dat much...

till de nxt post. Ciao.

-Sephios-

Bad Romance

Been a long time since i last posted. Soon have to change the layout of the blog, to welcome 2010. Totally no plans on how to change it. Maybe close down? Havent been updating anyways.. well I'll decide again when I get to it. haha.. Still long to go.

Recently, Lady Gaga's new song, "Bad Romance" so addicted to it and de MV. Especially the dance moves, HOT!!

Its sad that how sometimes, somethings are just too late. If only everything was earlier, it will be perfect. Its not as if this was a impromptu. Its jus, fate a lil too late. Nothing sends me in such a turmoil ever since... Nothing makes me so stoned since... Its like amnesia.

Kinda reminds me of the song "Poison" by Groove Coverage. "I wanna love U but I better not touch, I wanna hold u but my sense telling me to stop, I wanna kiss u but i want it too much, I wanna taste you but your lips are venomous poison." Its like so dramatic rite? Well it is. Actually deres a lot of drama in everyones life. Its so dramatic dat sometimes it seems so impossible.

"If only, we've met earlier..." those words from u, so true. But now its too late, or isit not? Cant even blog properly now. So confused la. Everything is so messy that I cant figure it out myself somehow.

Sometimes my wishes seem to come true in the most horrible kind of way. Its like dere's always a condition to it. Jus like the show "Bedazzled". The wishes always comes true but w a lil, actually alot of side effects. Its prolly the same for me now.

I want Ur Bad Romance~

-Sephios-

An Imperfect Angel...

Woo yea~ countdown countdown!! 2 more days to Mariah Carey's new album!! Memoirs of an Imperfect Angel!! Cant wait sia!!haha... Hmm deres also dis song by taylor swift and boys like girls, "Two is better than one" Cant seem to find it for dl sia.. hmm anyone have can send me? xD hahah

Anyways been a long time since I llast blogged, I know. Its just I have these emotions all welled up, all the happiness fustrations, anger, ya da ya da, all together, and it seems so hard for me to put them in words. morever to spell it out on a blog where everyone can see.. some things are jus personal and pvt to be posted out... mostly these few days are emo-ness and anger. Very little happpiness... not that dont have...

Met some great frens haha, Clubber Buddies!! =D Its time to bring the Parties back on!!! Woo hoo!!!! Speaking of clubbing... I saw B recently at a club.. Apparently B is sorta still avoiding me.. I think, i asked B out, but B said isn't free... well benefit of doubt, but even if its jus a lie, wat can I do?

Oso saw my.. hmmm wat u call that? My "mental barrier" who always seems to be better den me, and one whom I wish to compare to but jus cant reach. Ok its complicated. Yea I have a low self esteem tho as much as possible i try not to think I have... hahah I know I am not speaking logically now.. whenever I have lots of emotion bottled, a sudden outpour usually made me not able to think properly haha...

ANyways, tmr, will be my 4TH DRIVING TEST, hopefully my last, cos I hope I will FINALLY PASS.zZZZZZZzzzz...

Hmm I realised my blog needs a revamp soon xD Currently thinking of a new concept. Well they say, to have a new start, u need to start new. Prolly, to make my life, hopefully, more interesting and less emo.. i shall chnage a new concept, which is less emo or not emo.. haha... this means colour, picture will need a makeover =D but all this is still in planning phase =x

Till nxt time~

Oh yea, I jus thought of a mroe original nick, better den Seraphi, More original, hopefully a new nick oso a new start. How does Sephios sound? =D nice rite?? Original!! Not liek Seraphi, well this nick was from my Fav Angel digimon Seraphimon take away de mon.

SO now Sephios, more original, cut and paste from diff names, and i dont think its taken by ppl tho.... I jus like Having a nick dat starts w an 'S' haha....

-ShawnZ aka Sephios-

Shopping SpppppprrriIIIIIIIiiiIIIIEEeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEEEE~?

I jus love shopping =D Really can get ur mind off things.

Hmmm went around shopping for friend's bdae pressies. Got one and left one more... needa go back do research on the thing she wants 1st haha... Dont wanna get sth one doesnt want haha.

Anyways, ended buying more things for myself den for others =x haha.. had dinner at 'Say Cheeze' a restaurant in Tampines 1... The food is great and de price is reasonable...

Too bad didnt bring my cam, didnt expect to eat dere haha... ordered the Bailey's Cheesecake.. Hmmm~ it was delicious, especially the shot of bailey's beside it =p hahaha shit!! I m an ALCOHOLIC!!

Actually wanted to buy a season of Scrubs, ended up forgetting abt it.. well nxt time den.. =/

Hmmmmm the reason why i can do so much shopping now compaerd to last time is becos of signing on... Maybe i shld sign on for life eh? haha... doubt I will though...

Anyways, dont really have anything to say for this post..

till nxt time I suppose...

-ShawnZ-

Best Birthday? Or Worst?

Yea.. my impt 21st Bdae past, with me, arranging a get tgt dinner on Sat w frens, WHIC, was cancelled, postponed, wateva. It nvr happened. Ppl not free... and so on.. haiz.. and worst, on my birthday iotself, had to book in early due to some event i had to participate nxt day. Speaking of which, wonders if its a blessing in disguise.



ANyways, start from the top, rem some post back I talked abt this person I like, let that person be B. Anyways, de ntie be4, jus randomly chatted w a good friend of mine, and randomly dropped this idea dat I hoped B rems mybirthday and wld send me a birthday wishing, since I did it for B on B's birthday. Well, On de nite, I mean early morn, abt 12am++ B wished me happy bdae!! Yea I was overjoyed! But then.. its jus a birthday wishing nth much, so I jus put off any other ideas. Den, on de nite of book in, yea, it sux, book in early, but guess who I saw when i was on my way back to camp at the bus stop!! Yes!! Its B!! Omg!! Is dis god trying to give me a sign, a chance, or isit jus trying to play a stupid cruel trick on me on my Birthday!! Yea, till now i still dont get this 'arrangement'. Jus made me feel bad all over again.



And well, I DID have a Bdae celebration, on 8th Aug when I was in tekong, my guys who went in this wave w me, bought a Sara Lee cake, and surprised me jus before we were abt to watch Saw 4... haha... well a Sara Lee cake is better den no cake at all, I guess...



Hmm why am i suddenly talking abt this when it happened a week ago?? well, yttd watched Liar, Liar cldnt help but feel, if only birthday wishes DO really come true.. haiz.. I hope mine does =( somehow, one way or another....



oh well, better stop before this post turns emo again.



-ShawnZ-

I wan Water Dessert too.. T_T

Ok, nothing much to say.. gonna go on courses soon... and well lucky I wont be needing to go for my ops during my bdae =D

SOmehow I just dont understand, y of all the other officers and PCs available my DyS1, the one who plans DO duties, keep pestering me to take one up although I am seriously not able to, and with valid reasons like ops or else is I've got compulsory activities. And worst, he initially wanted me to take up duty on my Bdae itself? and when I told him I cant cos its ym bdae, he says, his own mother bdae he oso do DO duties. Now his mother angry~ wan disown him~ yada yada.... Wth? Well, unless his mother was supposed to be 21 den, I guess I got nth to say huh? But I guess not, cld it? Anyways, I dont care, I wont do it on my Bdae and dats it. Altho I know I prolly wont have anything planned for dat day, since its a sunday, and my frens and I prolly needs to book in on the nite itself.. soo.... unless some1 asks me out in the afternoon... and sux, I always wanted to have a extravagant 21st bdae, but I guess, NS really dont allow such things =( Not only am I hvaing a hard time alrdy making time for myself, due to Ns, my frens some are oso not free..haiz.... And den dere is dis guy, who told me I shld jus asked him to FO, actually quite alot did ask me to do so. And he added, i am so soft, sure kena makan 1. Eh.. am I being makan now? I guess sometimes one wld jusbitch abt, grumble, but always lacks the courage to really do sth abt it. Yup I m one. I only bitch, grumble, but nvr seem to be able to muster up the courage to really go face it. De same as risks. I guess, when u've failed too many times, risks is jus sth U wont dare to take unless u r certain of it. I did try, to u know, be a little more risky, dare to face up to challenges, dare to gamble (not mj-ing kind, or gambling kind of gamble), but somehow deres dis thing inside of me keep holding me back no matter how much I try to beat it. I guess, I am always my own obstruction and barrier.

Anyways, dats not the purpose of this post. the reason for this post is, I'M IN LOVE~!! Ya rite. -_- Ok no more nonsense... the reason for this post is, I browsed thru youtube, my old old hobby, found a couple of funny vids, a few of which is a korean guy trying to sing english songs, rem de last time the bollywood Thriller? well this is sth like it. So Enjoy!! Starting with, my all time Fav song, TOUCH MY BODY!!

So.. No one's gonna Shave Him eh? =p


ok the others not as funny.. so dats abt it. ENJOY!! Guess he is a BIG fan of mariah carey, almost all his videos he is singing songs of Mariah Carey.

-ShawnZ-

Just another Post

Ok, this post probably will be just another of my random rambling. Lets see, wat should I talk abt hmmm...

Well, lets start at my new unit, new coy, yea, currently in Maju SD coy, havent got my platoon yet, currently jus stand in PC for some1's plt. The guys, well they're quite fun to be with. Alll ORD-ing soon haha. Ok before I go on sprouting wat I shldnt sprout, probably i Should stop here on my army stuffs.

Anyways, speaking of Sprouts, ytd I went to watch Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, well, its cool, however abit disappointing if U had read the book. Nevertheless, its still good. Maybe I said that cos I love Harry Potter Series. Kinda sad, de book ended tho =/ But den, a Neverending story isn't nice to read anyways. Wat Talking me??

Before the movie we went to eat at Changing Appetite which is at Marina Square, that place seems so famillar but I onyl realise that was the place, I had my 1st date with a certain some1 whom I used to, and still adore. It was great to reminisce that feeling again, but kind of sad, as it jus a part of the sad memory I had, just like listening to the song "With you' which was the song that was playing when we both were dere. Anyways, dats all de past, so lets jus skip it away.
I really need to buy a new camera for myself sia...I am missing so many great photo times jus becos I have neither a cam phone nor a cam w me. After dat we went to sneak a peek of the fireworks from the NDP preview and it was magnificent and beautiful.

Dont cha hate the feeling of pining for someone, something to happen? Well currently cant stop thinking abt something, someone. Jus the thought, made me smile, Just like the song Smile - Uncle Kracker. Great Song, meaningful lyrics. Well, I went to search and got 2 more other songs by him, Follow me and Drift away, both are great too!! My kinda of songs!

Spekaing of songs, each time I listen to Wonder girls Nobody, kinda remind me of my poly clique of frens, 'Slave' Cornie, "Super White aka Chiobu*pukes*' Jacinth, 'Da Tou' Hanqun, and Jinshun. Yea wierd eh, Jinshun got no nickname!! I just realised we didnt give him one!! Nvm nxt time meet up we shall discuss this issue =x Anyways, i was saying, not that we had met up and that song was like 'our song', but its just dat, that song has a set of dance moves, which if it was in poly days, hanqun and I wld prolly go learn it and then play with it when we get together. Yea its stupid things like dis which made my poly days fun, other den my waterpolo =) Speaking of which, havent been going for a long time. wonders if I had gone rusty.. =/

I really missed those times going crazy and going out w frens and yea a little waterpolo on the way too =) Haiz..

This is a freaking boring Sunday!! Maybe I shall go out later to buy the Portable DVD player which I set out to buy be4 my book in. And sux, I got DO duties this tues and coming sun.. -_- Booooo.....


-ShawnZ-